iCross Dress
by PoodlesandNoodles
Summary: Sam is in trouble again, and has been sent to an all girls correctional camp. Carly doubts that she will be able to control herself. Freddie believes everything can be solved with a few genderbending tactics...this can't possibly end good.
1. Prologue

I've been wanting to write this story for a while now. I'm so stoked. It's gonna be chock full of craziness and well, if you want fast updates leave reviews.

Disclaimer: no own.

iCross Dress

* * *

....Prologue....

This was it. Flora's true identity had finally been revealed, and there was nothing she could do about it. She wanted to cover her ears as loud sirens rang throughout the building, but all she could do was run. Her eyes watched the back of Sam's head; huge blonde locks bounced around in all different directions. Flora was sure that the staff was going to catch them, and for a lack of better judgment, she was secretly planning to ditch Sam and turn herself in. There was just one, teeny-weeny, little problem. Sam's hand was locked around her wrist, and she could not release herself from the troublemaker's grip.

"In here." Sam whispered and opened the door to the janitor's closet. She pushed Flora past some mops and water pipes, until her body was pressed up against the back wall.

"This is all my fault." Flora whined while rubbing her hands over her face.

"Shut up." Sam hissed and squinted her eyes. She had no idea what Flora was talking about or why the correctional staff was after her, but she'd be damned if they took her away without some sort of fight. Sam felt that Flora had been sent from God to keep her out of trouble. There had been too many close instances where Sam would have screwed up and landed herself in juvie had Flora not been there to make her be good. So she owed the weird girl…….big time. The blonde turned and grabbed Flora by her shoulders. "Listen. I don't know what it is that you've done, but if it's the last thing I do**, I will** bust you out of this place."

"Sam, listen to me" Flora begged. "I need to tell you something important."

"No more talking!" She snapped and covered the girl's mouth with her hand.

The door to the Janitor's closet creaked opened. Sam's head shot forward, and her eyes widened in horror. A footstep echoed off of a pipe and Flora was convinced it was all over.

"Sam, Freddie, are you in here!" Gabby's voice carried itself to the back of the closet.

"Gabby!" Sam pushed herself away from Flora and ran to the door. "Man, I don't think I've ever been so happy to see your squishy, round face." The blonde squealed, grabbing Gabby's cheeks.

"Would you stop that. There isn't much time!" Gabby slapped Sam's hands away and straightened out her hair, which had somehow titled to the side. "Tell Freddie to come on while there's still a chance to escape."

"Who are you talking about Gabs? Who are you calling Freddie?"

Gabby opened her mouth, but nothing came out of it. She quickly realized that Sam was still clueless about everyone's disguises. "Oh gees.. nev- never mind. Let's just go."

Flora stepped forward, and Sam immediately turned and stared at her. She attempted to scrutinize her face, but she was jerked away by Gabby who made an effort to drag her forward. They ran until they reached the cafeteria. They met up with Carlton and Mrs. Shatner who looked frantic. "What the heck took you so long!" Carlton freaked as he ran up to the group.

Mrs. Shatner grabbed the ends of her skirt and followed him. "My distraction isn't going to last forever." She said, throwing her hands on her hips. She whipped her braid to the side and frowned.

The sirens were still going off; so Sam had a hard time hearing the yells that passed back and forth between Gabby, Carlton and Mrs. Shatner. She scratched the back of her head and tried not to look baffled.

"Stop fighting, and let's get out of here!" Flora interrupted their squabble and gave them all desperate glances.

Sam watched the four of them with a blank expression on her face. She was still confused as to why Gabby had called Flora Freddie, and now that she thought about it, Carlton really sounded a whole lot like Carly. His weird voice fluctuations could not just be the result of puberty. And what about Gabby, who in all aspects, looked and acted just like Gibby? Oh, and then there was Mrs. Shatner, who Sam was already convinced was just Spencer dressed in drag. Sam blinked a few times.

"Sam, are you ok?" Flora grabbed the girl's arm. "We gotta go."

Sam looked up into Flora's eyes and slowly pulled her arm out of her grasp. "Just who are you exactly?" she asked, and took a step back.

* * *

Tell me what u think. Each chapter will be longer than this, and they will gradually lead up to this point. Anyway I really want to know what you guys think so far and whether or not this story seems like it'll be good or not.

Poodle mY noodle


	2. Karma

Thanks for the reviews. They were very nice. As for the few of you who put me on author alert, I would really appreciate a review, because not only does it fill me in on what you want out of the story, it also inspires me to get chapters out faster, and I really just want to know what you think. So plz review! But anyway, thanks again to those who already have.

Disclaimer: no own

_**iCross Dress**_

_**Ch1. Karma**_

* * *

Carly Shay was never known to have anxiety, yet there she was, huffing and puffing, clearly on the brink of having a panic attack. She gripped the letter Sam had tossed onto the floor, until it began to wrinkle under her finger tips. It seemed her worst nightmare was finally coming true, BECAUSE

there was a possibility iCarly could end…….for good.

Carly lifted her head and looked towards the kitchen. Her yellow-headed friend was scavenging through her fridge. "What is this Sam?" She hollered while waving the letter around like a flag. Her body shivered with tremors. She was just that infuriated.

Sam rolled her eyes as she retrieved a large bowl of leftover spaghetti. "Calm down Carls. It's just a letter."

A sigh slipped between Carly's lips, and her shoulders dropped as she tried to relieve herself of her Sam induced stress. "You're pushing your luck and you know it." She said as she walked over to the refrigerator. She kicked the door closed, because Sam had a habit of leaving it open, then folded her arms over her chest. A brilliant scowl disfigured her mouth, and her eyes glistened with an intense glare. Sam lifted the bowl to her face, avoiding all eye contact.

"What did you do Sam? Tell me now!" Carly tried her best to keep her voice at an indoor level, but she was failing miserably.

"Is it really that big of a deal?" The blonde yawned. She shoved her hand into the bowl and scooped out a meatball.

Carly bit her lip. She was so frustrated. How could Sam be so apathetic? Was her brain not registering the extent of how much crap she was in? Of how much crap she was putting Carly and Freddie in?" "Yes, it's a big deal! Why wouldn't it be a big deal? Do you even know what this letter is saying?"

Sam chewed her food slowly. "Something about attending a new school next year. Blah, blah, and more blah." She answered nonchalantly. "So I got into a little trouble, and now Principal Franklin and his monkeys want to send me to a school _for the troubled_." She carelessly folded her hands into the pasta. "I don't see why your getting so worked up. I mean, I've been wanting to peace out of Ridgeway since the third grade, and now I have the chance. If anything, I thought you'd be happy for me."

Carly's mouth dropped open in disbelief. Sam was kidding, right? She didn't honestly believe she was being sent off to a different school.

"Seriously, what's the chiz?" The blonde looked at Carly genuinely confused.

"Sam," she snapped, "this is a letter confirming you're registration to Seattle's one year, juvenile delinquent, correctional program!"

Sam stopped eating and stared at her best friend with eyes as wide as saucers. Carly nodded her head, pleased that Sam's apathy had finally disappeared.

"Welp," The blonde slurred out of the side of her mouth, "I guess I better go pack." She said and shoved one last handful of spaghetti down her throat. She pushed herself away from the table and made her way to the front door. Carly quickly flipped her around.

"Wait, are you really just gonna go through with this?" She freaked.

"Of course not. I'm running away."

"Sam, you can't do that!"

"Then what am I suppose to do?" She asked angrily.

Carly tapped her foot against the floor, a sign that she was about to come up with some sort of idea, and Sam crept back to her cold, Italian dish.

"Well, depending on how serious your stupid act of shenanigans was," the brown haired girl started, "there's a possibility that I could make a negotiation with principal Franklin and the school board and have them suspend you until the end of the semester. I can convince them to do that instead of sending you to jail for an entire year."

Sam's lips puckered as she slurped up a noodle. "Hmm, that might work." She replied as she swallowed.

"I hope!" Carly wailed, her hair springing out on its ends. "You know, sometimes I think your head is full of bacon grease!"

"I wish." Sam mumbled as she dropped a glob of sauce into her mouth.

"Ok, I'm here; so what's the emergency!" Freddie shouted after he shoved the apartment door open. Both Carly and Sam turned their heads in his direction

"Did you have to bring the chicken head into this too." Sam grunted and pitched the remains of her meal into the sink. "I'm already annoyed."

"Sam's going to Juvie!" Carly ran up to her geeky friend and slapped the letter into the middle of his chest. "Read it." She ordered. Freddie glanced down at the paper then pulled it from under Carly's hand. He read the note to himself, and Carly waited impatiently for his reaction. She had expected him to stress out and panic, like she herself was doing, but when he finished, he just blinked and shrugged.

"I left my Galaxy Wars, club meeting for this?" He stated simply and looked over at Sam accusingly. "This doesn't surprise me at all."

"And you being in a club, made specifically for nerds and nubs, doesn't surprise me at all." She shot back as she walked over to the counter that separated the kitchen from the family room.

"Good one Sam." Freddie replied sarcastically. He angrily sat down on the couch. "That insult was so original. I'll be sure to reward you with a cookie later." He added.

Sam narrowed her eyes. Freddie smirked at her condescendingly.

"You. Like. Penises." She declared.

The nub furiously glared at her.

"Don't start you guys!" Carly spoke up and lifted her hands to her head. "Freddie, this is serious."

"How is this serious?" The technician scoffed. "Sam is finally getting what she deserves. It's karma; there's nothing more to it." A banana flew across the room and beamed him in the head just as he finished talking. "Ow," he cried, rubbing the back of his head, "Sam!"

"It's karma." She mocked, rearranging the small tower of fruit she had disassembled.

"Do you see what I mean?" Freddie looked at Carly and spread out his arms, emphasizing his point.

"And what about iCarly!" She shouted. The room became awkwardly silent. "Does the web show mean anything to you two?" She tried not to sound desperate, but her friends were being difficult. She turned and looked at Freddie. "Do you really expect to continue the show without Sam?" She asked.

The boy looked down at his feet. "No." He answered guiltily.

"And did you ever stop to think that maybe, one day, the consequences of your actions might lead to the cancellation of our show?" She turned to Sam, holding back the raging urge to lecture her.

"No." Sam replied.

"This isn't a joke, ok. Right now we have a very bad issue to deal with, and if we don't figure out something soon," She sighed, "then iCarly is going to be over."

"iCarly is not going to be over." Freddie replied, lifting his head up. "I don't know what it is were gonna have to do to fix things, but I'll do whatever it takes."

"Same here." Sam agreed while walking into the living room. "Whatever it takes." She reiterated and linked her arm through Carly's. "And then I'll never ship Ms. Briggs furniture to Taiwan ever again."

"Sam!" Carly and Freddie looked at each other than back at the mischievous blonde. They both were at a lost for words.

"She had it coming." Sam shrugged and sat on the couch. She threw her feet up on the table and grabbed the remote. "It's Karma. Right Freddie?" She nudged the boy's side with her elbow.

"Su-Sure Sam, whatever you say." He replied, leaning back in his seat and throwing his arm over his eyes.

Carly shook her head irritably and walked back into the kitchen. "I need a drink." She whined.

* * *

So I decided to split the first chapter into three parts and make it into three chapters. I did it so I could update quicker. Although, after the third chapter the length of each chapter will be a minimum of 2500 words; so if you're into bigger chunks of story, you will get what you want. Trust me.


	3. Try my Fudge Balls

This chapter should have been out sooner, but school got in the way. Thanks for the reviews. I only ask that u continue to give me feedback so I know whether or not you guys like the story or not. Reviews always keep me motivated too; so if u have no other reason to send a review then do it for faster updates!

Disclaimer: no own

AN: A school board has more than three members, usually, but I didn't feel like creating a band of characters; so I just stuck with three solid people. Another thing, Freddie's contract may or may not be something he illegally forged. So to all you people who might try to bust me out and say 'what Freddie has done is impossible,' It's a fictional story and I'm working with the iCarly universe; so something like this shouldn't be deemed as impossible.

_**iCross Dress**_

_Ch2. Try my Fudge Balls_

* * *

Freddie would never admit it, but sometimes he liked to observe Sam. He rested his back against the water fountain, analyzing every move the blonde made and questioning whether or not she was clinically insane.

"Stop being so difficult." She groaned as she tried to stuff a subway sandwich, that was the size of a human leg, into her locker.

"She's insane." The technician concluded under his breath before he casually walked over and stood next to her. "Do you need some help with that?" He spoke slowly and in a tone that could have been perceived as annoyance.

Sam turned and looked at him indifferently. Freddie expected her to say no, but the second bell was about to ring, and what good would it do for her to be late for class? The last thing she needed was another teacher to be angry with her.

"If you think you're man enough, sure, I'd love for you to help." She replied sarcastically.

Freddie rolled his eyes before he pulled the sandwich out of the locker.

"What are you doing?" she complained.

Freddie didn't answer. He broke the sandwich into five pieces, stacked the pieces inside the locker, and then shut the door with a satisfying 'click'. He turned his gaze towards Sam and said, "Is that man enough for you?" A smirk outlined his lips.

"Get outta my face Benson." She answered, using her hand to shoo the boy away.

"You're welcome." Freddie said coyly, and rapped his knuckles against the locker before he sauntered off.

Sam watched his back until he disappeared up the stairwell. "Fagola." She grumbled and stuffed her hands into her pockets. The bell rung moments later. "Great gravy!" She cursed and ran down the hall.

_**...**_

"I don't mean to be a pessimistic patty, but how is this going to keep Sam from going to Juvie?" Freddie asked and looked back at Sam who was dressed up as a sunshine girl. She held out a pack of fudge balls to a group of kids with lunch trays, but they completely ignored her. The technician clicked his teeth and lifted a spoon full of pudding to his mouth. Some of it dripped onto the table, and he frowned.

"Be quiet Patty!" Carly snapped. "I know what I'm doing."

Freddie almost rolled his eyes, but he didn't want to offend the sensitive girl. She couldn't put up with his sarcasm like Sam. "Please explain, because I'm totally lost."

Carly sighed and took a few sips from her juice box. She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and looked at Freddie with big, brown, worried eyes. "I figured if I could lighten up Sam's persona, before her meeting with principal Franklin, the school board would be more susceptible to negotiation."

"Oh." It made sense. He guessed.

"I'm gonna try to convince them that Sam can change without having to go to a correctional program."

"So you made Sam a sunshine girl?" He responded. It was one of the worst ideas Carly had ever come up with.

"Yes, yes I did!" Her body tensed. "Do you have a problem with the sunshine girls, cuz I was a sunshine girl once, and I liked it very, very much!"

Freddie cocked an eyebrow. "Did you really?"

"No." she folded and sighed heavily.

Freddie squinted his eyes then nodded his head. "Carly, turning Sam into a sunshine girl isn't going to work."

"And why not?" Carly argued. She crossed her arms over her chest and pouted. She looked very much like a two-year old.

On que, A scream was heard over by the vending machines. Carly and Freddie immediately turned their attention towards the commotion. Somehow Sam had managed to straddle three junior high boys, and with a menacing grin she was cramming handfuls of fudge balls into their mouths.

Carly and Freddie jumped out of their seats. They ran and dragged Sam back to her booth.

She sat down in a chair. Her fists were clenched tightly at her sides. Carly attempted to straighten the yellow hat that had gone askew on the side of her head, but Sam slapped her hand away.

"What happened?" Carly asked. "Why were you shoving fudge balls down those little boys throats?"

Sam shot air out of the bottom of her lip, and her bangs flew away from her eyes. "I was civilly trying to sell them some fudge balls, and then one of the little suckers told me he had fudge balls in his pants, and that if I wanted to, I could try one of his."

Freddie took a step back and bit his tongue. He had to keep himself from laughing.

"I see," Carly responded, "well, I guess you had every right to do what you did.

"You bet I did." The blonde seethed. "This was a stupid idea!" She tried to straighten out her uniform top, but it was too big for her. She pulled it off and dropped it to the floor. Luckily she remembered to wear a tank top… and a bra.

"I know." Carly whined and sat down in the open chair next to her. She rested her forehead at the edge of the table. "What are we going to do Freddie!" She panicked. "Sam's conference with the school board is less than three hours away."

The boy didn't answer.

".…..I'm gonna have to start planning out our last web cast." Carly lifted her head. "It's over. It's really all over."

"I got it covered." Freddie said suddenly.

Sam and Carly looked at him completely confused.

"Wha-what? How? Are you yanking my chain, Benson? Because I'm really not in the mood." Sam blinked slowly. She looked at Carly who was still staring at Freddie.

"Just trust me, alright." Freddie grinned. "I think everything is going to be ok."

Sam stood out of her seat. "You know, you could have said something _before_ Carly made me dress up in this jank outfit." The blonde took slow, predacious steps towards the dark haired nub.

"Now, now, Sam." Freddie started to shake. "I know your angry, but let's not do anything rash. I mean, if you think about it, I'm your only hope for not going to juvie for a year; so remember what your putting on the line before you decide to rearrange my face." Freddie stopped and gave the blonde a stern look.

Sam looked him up and down, daring him to speak again. Freddie mimicked her, but immediately wish he hadn't. Sam was wearing a very short, yellow skirt with knee-high socks and a formfitting, white camisole. It was a very provocative outfit; so he, unintentionally, became aware of her body and the nice simple curves that it held. He took a noticeable step back, and Sam looked at him with an inquisitive expression on her face. It wasn't right for Freddie to think Sam was attractive, because she wasn't.

At least, that's what he told himself.

"Stop Sam." Carly interjected. If Freddie really has a plan that might work, then you shouldn't beat him up."

Sam shook her head. "No, I need to hit something."

Freddie quickly grabbed a pack of fudge balls. He pulled one of the candies out and tossed it into the air. Sam punched it with perfect precision, and the chocolate burst into a million pieces.

"Impressive." Carly said as she watched fudge particles float to the floor.

"Dido." Freddie blinked.

Sam punched fudge balls until the end of lunch.

_**...**_

"We can not have this conference unless Ms. Puckett is present." One of the school board members spoke. She was a bigger woman with thin, black glasses and curly, white hair. She looked at the other two members, their faces stiff, and they nodded with her in agreement.

Freddie wanted to be angry. It was just like Sam's mother to completely disappear when her daughter was in trouble. He breathed. He had to stay focused. He was more than positive that his plan was going to work but only if he kept his cool.

"That's why we're here ma'am." Carly spoke.

"So you and Freddie want to fill in for Sam's mom?" Principal Franklin asked while looking back and forth between the two teenagers.

"Were sort of like her parents if you think about it." Carly joked. "I mean, we try our best to take care of her and make sure she has a roof over her head, food to eat, and a nice, warm bed to sleep in at night. Right Freddie." The girl playfully tapped the boy on his arm. He smiled nervously and nodded his head. It was a shame that nothing Carly had said was a lie.

Freddie watched the three board members. The expressions on their faces were still serious. They obviously weren't buying Carly's joke, (even if the joke lamp shaded the truth) but Principal Franklin shook his head. He understood the issue with Sam's mother. "Fine, it's alright with me." he said.

"Thank you so much Principal Franklin." Freddie beamed.

"You aren't being serious." A man spoke up. He had black hair and small mole near his lip. "They're only kids. We can't have them pretending to be legal guardians of a juvenile delinquent. This isn't an imaginary game of house."

"Sam is not a Juvenile delinquent." Carly replied angrily.

"You keep telling yourself that, girl."

Freddie gritted his teeth. He grabbed his backpack, pulled out a folder, and threw it onto the principal's desk.

"What is this?" A second man asked. He leaned over Principal Franklin and picked up the folder. Inside, there was a packet. "This can't possibly be real." He twisted the end of his mustache as he looked over the content.

"But it is." Freddie smiled smugly. "That _**court**_ approved contract gives me, Carly Shay, and Spencer Shay the right of ownership to Sam Puckett whenever her mom leaves Seattle for more than five days.

Carly stared at Freddie in awe.

"Of course, when her mother returns the contract is revoked but only until she is absent once again. When that happens, the contract is then renewed." No one spoke a single word. "This shouldn't be too difficult for you smart and wise adults to understand."

The man who held the contract let his counterparts read the document as well.

"If you'd like, I can call my lawyer." Freddie added. "He'll gladly set up a date with-"

"I think you made your point." The woman spoke, and the excess skin under her chin jiggled like a glob of jell-o.

Carly grabbed Freddie's arm and squeezed it. He smiled at her, fully enjoying her attention.

"Well," Principal Franklin cleared his throat, feigning to be unimpressed by Freddie's counteract, "now that the issue of Sam's mother is settled, let's begin." He pushed the button on his intercom. "Will someone please escort Sam Puckett into my office please. Thank you."

Sam entered the office still wearing only half of her sunshine girl outfit.

Freddie rubbed his hand over his face. She really should have known better then to show up like that.

The school board didn't hesitate to cast mental judgments against her.

She pulled a chair up and sat in between her two, best friends. The principal sighed and tried not to look disappointed.

"Sam, you should have worn the uniform top." Carly whispered out of the side of her mouth

The blonde shrugged.

"Samantha, do you know why you're here?" The principal asked. He strummed his fingers along the edge of his desk.

Sam gripped the arms of the chair. "Yes." She answered simply. A small scowl tugged at the bottom of her lip.

"Would you like to explain why you thought it was necessary to steal Ms. Briggs furniture out of her home and ship it to Taiwan?"

The man with the mustache and the man with the mole shook their heads, still perplexed by the absurdity of such a deed.

Sam Looked at principal Franklin and the three members of the school board with a mysterious glint in her eye. A hint of a smirk hovered over her lips, and she said. "Karma."

Freddie fingered a small hole on the side of his jeans. Sam had guts, a lot of guts, and, to a certain degree, it was almost moving. I guess he sort of admired her extreme determination, but what he'd give for her to use some commonsense.

"Are you unaware of how much trouble you're in young lady?" The woman abruptly barked. She seemed offended,….. of what…. well, there was probably a list of things.

"What Sam meant to say," Carly fidgeted with the sleeve of her shirt, "is that she is very sorry, and that she didn't know what she was thinking, and that-"

"Just stop Carly." Sam interrupted. "I meant exactly what I said." The room was silent; so she continued. "Ms. Briggs' teaching methods are extremely spiteful. She hates her students. She gives out homework assignments that are worth semester final grades and fills out detentions for people who sneeze or breathe too loudly. If she thinks a class is being loud and disruptive she makes them do push-ups until their arms practically fall off. And on test days she plays her bagpipe, claiming her music to be relaxing and brain stimulating. You can't expect anyone to complete a test with a bagpipe playing in the background!" She snapped. "And this ain't even a third of what all she's done over the past eleven years that I've been here. So she had it coming, and that's my only reasoning."

For a brief moment no one said anything. Then the man sitting next to the lady with the flab under her chin spoke. "Samantha Puckett, by the way you speak of Ms. Briggs, it is clear to us that you feel mistreated. But what you have done is committed a felony, and no matter what your reasoning may be you can not be excused for breaking the law. Now Principal Franklin was kind enough to schedule this meeting with the three of us for the sake of you possibly getting a smaller and undeserving punishment, but if you feel that what you've done isn't wrong and have absolutely no remorse then you leave us no choice then to send you to Seattle's, Juvenile delinquent, correctional center for the next eleven and a half months."

Sam didn't know what to say. Surprise was present on her features, but no one was sure whether or not she was going to apologize.

"Sam?" Freddie poked her arm. The blonde looked at him then turned her head to look at Carly.

"I'm sorry." She spoke softly.

Carly smiled and petted the back of Sam's head..

The lady looked at Sam distastefully then scoffed. "Since she has agreed to apologize for her wrong doings, her punishment will be reduced down to nine months."

"Nine months!" Carly, Freddie, and Sam all yelled.

"Yes, nine." The lady hissed. "What did you think we were going to do, suspended her until the end of the year. Don't be preposterous! There are less than two months remaining for this final semester."

"But our web show!" Carly turned her gaze to Principal Franklin. He looked positively broken, but the school board had more power over the situation then him. It was their call, not his. But it wasn't over yet. Freddie pulled out his PearPhone and quickly sent a text to Gibby. It read: **Put the goose in the pot**.

Sam bent over and touched her head to her thighs. "This is all my fault." She whispered to herself. Freddie thought she was crying, but when he crouched down beside her, he saw that she wasn't. "It's not over yet." He whispered into her bangs. He stood up and gave Carly a long securing look.

"I have a question." Freddie said as he turned to look at the three adults sitting behind his principal.

"What is it?" The man with the mole on his lip asked?

"Has Sam had charges pressed against her?"

"Of course," the other man answered as if Freddie were an idiot, "why else would she be registered for a correctional program?"

"Ok, that's all I wanted to know." Freddie replied and retook his seat. And like a scene from a movie, Ms. Briggs came bursting into Principal Franklin's office. Everyone jumped at the sudden disruption, except for Sam whose head was still pressed down against her thighs.

The woman straightened out her blouse and tucked a few locks of red hair back into the messy hair style she had had created with a multitude of bobby pins. She glared at Freddie then turned and smiled at the school board.

"And May I ask why you are here and not attending to your Class Ms. Briggs?" Principal Franklin asked. He folded his hands over his desk.

"Yes, well you see," She started, "I think I may have been a little hard on Ms. Puckett, and well, I've decided to drop all charges."

_**...**_

Ha! ha! ha! The next chapter will be out soon. Tell me what you think. If your planning to just tag me for an alert, plz be kind enough to tell me what you think of the chapter first. I'm really excited about this story because it's very fun and entertaining to write, and I haven't even gotten to the good stuff yet; so stay tuned.

!PoodleMyNoodle!


	4. Mentioning the Catch

Thanks for the reviews. Here is the next chapter. This is the second to the last chapter before the main plot starts kicking in. So just sit back and enjoy the filler.

Disclaimer: no owe.

An: if there are any grammatical errors just avoid them for now. I'll fix them later.

_**iCross Dress **_

_Ch3. Mentioning the Catch_

* * *

Sam didn't like to think. It made her weak and nauseous; so she latched herself onto the Shay's couch. Her legs were hooked over the back panel, and her hair made a yellow puddle on the floor. All her blood went rushing to her head. It made her feel calm, and she lost all focus. She didn't know how to deal with the fact that Freddie had gone out of his way to save her butt. It didn't make any sense. But then again, maybe it did. The web show was just as much his life as it was anyone else's. He had a huge role too. _I need my paddleball. _She reminded herself then pulled the toy out from under one the cushions. With one pulse, she began to strike the ball recklessly until loud smacks echoed throughout the whole entire apartment. She grunted. He didn't do it for her. He did it for the web show.

"Sam what are you doing?" Carly spoke on the stairs. "iCarly starts in like ten minutes." She made a quirky grin, and stared at Sam's legs that were dangling over the back of the furniture.

"I'll be there, but right now I need to not think."

The dark haired girl cocked an eyebrow and began to walk slowly down the rest of the stairs. "You need to not think?" She rubbed the back of her neck. "That's an awkward sentence."

"It's the only way I can play this game." She said, referring to the paddleball in her hand.

Carly sighed then walked over and took a seat on the couch. She watched Sam and waited to see if her streak would break, but the blonde seemed to have complete control over the stupid toy.

"Who do you think invented the paddleball?" Carly asked, genuinely curious.

"Beats me. It was probably some lonely nub who had too much time on his hands." Sam answered. Her eyes blinked every five seconds.

Carly smacked her lips and looked forward at the television. "What's on your mind, kid?" She leaned back and rested her feet on the table.

"Blood." She answered.

Carly scratched her arm nervously.

"I meant literally, Shay. You know, I'm upside down; therefore my blood is rushing to my brain…my mind….whatever!" She sighed annoyingly.

"You know, ever since that meeting with the school board, you've been acting pretty weird."

Sam rolled her eyes. "What are you blabbing about?"

Carly shrugged. "I don't know. I just figured you'd be more relieved that your punishment was reduced down to one week at some lame camp." She paused and waited for a response. When Sam didn't say anything she egged her on with: "Yah, nine months to one week. That's a pretty big difference. Yep, pretty big."

"I am relieved." The blonde mumbled, and she began to spank the ball even harder.

Carly wasn't convinced. "Right. Well, since you claim to be ok would you get up now? We have to go start the show."

Sam did a backwards summersault off the couch and left the paddleball on the floor. She stretched her arms behind her head and stared at her best friend.

Carly didn't move.

"What are you waiting for? let's go." Sam scowled and ran towards the stairs.

_**...**_

"I'm glad you finally decided to show up." Freddie glared at Sam as she walked into the studio.

"I've been here the whole time you buttsucking lametard." The girl retorted and made Freddie flinch by pulling back her fist. "nub." she smirked.

He scoffed.

"It's true Freddie." Carly nodded. "She's been lying upside down on my couch, while playing paddle ball, this whole entire time."

"Why?" He asked, completely confused.

"Is it really any of your business?" The blonde snapped and took her place in front of the camera.

Freddie didn't respond. "Just get into your places."

"I'm already in my place!"

Carly shook her head and pulled two clown noses out of her pocket. "Why can't you two just get along?" She handed one of the noses to Sam and strapped her own around her face.

Freddie lifted up his camera and began the count down. He caught eyes with Sam and they glared at each other before he turned on his camera.

_**...**_

"I must say that tonight's web cast may have been one of our best." Carly grinned as she sipped her smoothie. She sat back in her chair and looked at her two best friends, feeling completely content with the world.

Sam nodded her head. "I completely agree." She looked at Freddie condescendingly. "What do you think Fredonanny?" She glanced at Carly who blushed and turned her head.

"Sam don't start." He warned. He was genuinely pissed.

"Oh, is wittle Fweddie sad because he ate a cupcake full of dead beetles." Her smirk became malicious

During the web cast, Sam made a bet with Freddie, telling him that if he could successfully come up with three jokes (that were actually funny) and make her and Carly laugh then he could have the cupcake she bought from the famous bakery down the street. Freddie, naively, took up the offer. It wasn't like he had anything to loose. But he should have known, when both Sam and Carly laughed at _**all**_ his jokes, that something fishy was going on. The two girls never laughed at his jokes. Never.

"Really, I just…" He opened his mouth, but shook his head and took a large drink of his smoothie.

"What is it Freddie?" Carly asked. She was concerned now.

"It's nothing." He said angrily.

Sam rolled her eyes. "If he wants to cop an attitude, let him. He's a baby anyway."

Freddie's foot dug into the floor. "Yet you're the one who constantly needs to be taken care of." He gritted.

Sam bit her lip. "That's a load of chiz and you know it."

"You keep telling yourself that Puckett." Freddie grabbed his drink and stood out of his seat. "I'm gonna head home." He said and walked out of the restaurant before Carly or Sam had a chance to speak another word.

"What the heck is his deal?" Sam frowned and crossed her arms over her stomach.

Carly sighed. "I guess he just expected you to be more….."

"Be more what?" The blonde asked confused. She was trying to hold back her anger, but she just hated feeling clueless.

"More appreciative. Gees Sam, if it wasn't for him I highly doubt Ms. Briggs would have dropped those charges." Carly pursed her lips. "I think he deserved more of a thank you rather than a cupcake full of dead beetles."

Sam's mouth dropped open. "Oh, give me a break. It wasn't like he did it all for me anyway."

"Then who did he do it for Sam?" Carly rationalized. "Think about it."

"But I hate thinking, and I don't have my paddle ball with me." The girl whined.

Carly sighed. "Whatever. This really doesn't concern me, but I expect you to thank Freddie properly before you leave tomorrow."

Sam dropped a handful of fries into her smoothie. "Maybe." She shook her drink around then pulled one of the fries out and ate it.

_**...**_

"Whelp, I guess this is goodbye." Sam awkwardly spoke. She, Freddie, Carly, and the woman with the gobble on her neck stood in the hallway outside of Carly's apartment.

Carly wrapped her into a small hug. "It's only a week silly. Don't be so upset." She replied jokingly.

"Shut it Carls." The blonde smiled and inhaled her friend's scent. She pulled back, and Carly gave her a look that she tried to avoid. She turned slowly and looked at Freddie. The boy stared back at her without a hint of emotion on his features.

"Uhh…ummm…..Freddie."

"Samantha, We must hurry. The bus leaves in less than thirty minutes, and I still have to drive you to the school." The lady spoke. Sam dug her nails into her palms.

"Just give me a second here. Ok rooster!" She snapped, and the board member turned red.

"Well, I never." She scoffed.

Sam, Freddie, and Carly all rolled their eyes. 'well, I never?' what a typical, old womanly response.

"What is it Sam?" Freddie said, immersing everyone back into the awkward atmosphere.

Sam looked at Carly who looked at her expectantly.

The blonde breathed heavily and looked at Freddie once again. "Thank you." She struggled. "If it wasn't for you I- I'd be…."

"Screwed." The boy completed her sentence.

"Yah." Sam nodded and held her hand out for the boy to grab. "So thanks."

Freddie looked at it and smiled. "No problem Puckett." He said and shook her hand accordingly. There was a brief moment of silence as the two teenagers looked at each other. They were unsure whether or not they should hug, but before any action could be made-

"Well this is all just lovely," the lady sneered sarcastically, "but really, we must get going. A good day to you Mr. Benson and to you Ms. Shay. Pray that you don't see me again."

Carly was struck by that, but the lady pivoted and stalked away before she could muster up a response.

"Uh bye." Sam said quietly and let go of Freddie's hand. She made her way down the stairwell and the boy slowly stuck his hand inside his pocket.

Carly waited until both Sam and the board member were gone before she spoke to Freddie. "What did she mean by, and I quote: 'Pray that you don't see me again.'" She mocked in a snooty, old lady's voice.

Freddie scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "Heh, about that." He swallowed the lump in his throat. "I think there's something that you should know."

Carly's eyes widened. "What are you talking about Benson? What should I know?"

The boy rocked back and forth on his toes nervously. "There's a catch to Sam's reduced punishment."

Carly closed her eyes. "Of course there is." She replied angrily. "There's always a catch!"

* * *

Some may feel that this chapter has a few holes in it or that it's missing a few elements, and I'll start by saying that I agree with you. There's a lot of detail that's missing in this chapter, but I'm saving a lot of things for later chapters; so the story has a better build up to it. Anyway review if you want faster updates.

Peace Love and NooooooDLesss


	5. Individuality

I'm thankful for the reviews, really I am. I only ask that if I'm on your author alert list or story alert list that u be so kind enough to drop a review. I like reading what people have to say about my story, and if u really don't have anything to say a simple "good job" would be nice. It keeps me motivated and motivation leads to faster updates and faster updates leads to happy readers.

Come on folks, give me a little cheese to live off of. Heh heh heh.

Disclaimer: u know the chiz…

AN: I don't think I made Spencer a little OOC, but if I did plz inform me; although I plan to make him crazier then usual once he and everyone finally go to the correctional camp.

Ignore the grammatical errors.

_**iCross Dress**_

_Ch4. Individuality_

* * *

Never in her life had Carly been so frustrated. She paced around in circles until she caught sight of Sam's paddleball near the computer. She immediately snatched the toy off of the counter and stared at it. Her gaze then shifted towards the couch. she shrugged before walking over and throwing her legs over the back panel. If playing paddleball upside down helped Sam to _not_ think then maybe it would do the opposite for Carly. She and Sam were polar opposites after all, and Carly desperately needed to think of a plan.

Freddie walked through the door just as Carly lifted up the paddle. "Carly, what exactly are you doing?" he asked as he walked slowly up to the couch. He stared at her, waiting for a response.

"I'm trying to think." she snapped, and pulled a few strands of hair away from her mouth.

"By playing paddle ball upside down on the couch?"

"Yes." She sated. Freddie looked at her peculiarly.

"Why are you looking at me like that? You didn't seem all that surprised when I told you Sam was doing it."

"That's because Sam is weird."

"And?"

" And you, my dear, are not weird." He paused and pursed his lips. "At least, not as weird as Sam."

"Well, there's no harm in trying." She replied snootily. "and don't call me dear." She swung the paddle forward and the ball sprung up towards the ceiling. When it came back down she tried to hit it, but she missed, and the ball popped her in the eye. "Ow." she hissed and threw the toy across the room. Freddie had to quickly dodge out of the way. He waited a second then sat down on the couch and helped Carly sit up.

"Are u gonna be ok?" He asked, worried.

Carly combed back her hair in one sporadic movement "No Freddie, I'm not." She whined and turned so her feet touched the floor. "I wish you would have told me sooner that there was a possibility Sam could end up going to Juvie, regardless of her going to that stupid camp." She clenched her fists. "I would have better prepared her before she left."

"It's not like she doesn't know of the drawback." The nub pointed out. "I was sure to inform her of what would happen if she got in trouble while she was there. She knows that if she screws up that the charges will be pressed on her again."

The brunette glared at Freddie, her brown eyes a dark pool of resent. Her lip twitched and Freddie flinched. "Gah…..I know." He finally gave in. " I should have mentioned something earlier, but I thought everything would be ok. So please don't be mad at me."

Carly sighed, and her gaze softened. "I'm not mad at you," She stiffened, "but I'm not happy with you either." She slapped the side of his arm.

The nerd rubbed it while frowning. "I'm Sorry, there's nothing more I can say or do."

"No, there is definitely something we can do?"

"Like what?" Freddie asked.

"I don't have a clue." Carly folded her arms across her chest,

Freddie scratched the back of his neck then stood and picked the paddle ball up off the floor. "Why was Sam playing Paddle ball upside down?"

"She was trying to _not_ think." The thin girl answered. "I figured if I did what she did then it would have the opposite effect on me. Since, you know, me and her are like opposites and stuff." She massaged the sides of her arms.

"Can you even play paddle ball, Carly?"

"Apparently not. "

"Move over." He commanded and returned to the couch.

"What are you doing?"

"Me and Sam are opposites too, but, unlike you, I actually know how to use a paddle ball." He answered as he rested his back on the cushion. His feet dangled aimlessly over the back panel.

The dark haired girl scoffed. "Knowing how to play with a paddle ball isn't exactly something to be proud of."

"That's what you think." Freddie replied condescendingly and began to spank the ball effortlessly.

Carly was definitely jealous.

_**...**_

Spencer sat in the kitchen with his hands folded on top of the table. His jaw was dropped slightly, and his eyebrows were arched giving him a look of utter bewilderment. Carly and Freddie stood on either side of him, casting shadows over the top of his head. They were waiting for an answer.

"So let me get this straight." The man started. "You want me to make Freddie into a girl?"

Both Freddie and Carly shifted uneasily.

"Ye-yes." Carly finally replied. Tapping her fingers nervously against Spencer's chair.

"And Gibby too" Freddie added.

Spencer exhaled slowly. "Freddie," he said and turned to look at the boy. "do you want to talk about this? We can go fishing or hog hunting or maybe go roll around in some mud… like _men._" Spencer blinked slowly, feeling as if he made some sort of mistake. "Unless," he looked at Freddie seriously, "you'd rather talk while we polished our nails."

"It's not because _I want _to be a girl Spencer!"

"Ya know, fifteen is a very tough age. You get all these weird urges, and sometimes they cause you to do weird things." He blinked. "Although, it doesn't faze me that Gibby wants to be a girl too." He thought about it. "Nope, it doesn't faze me at all."

"Carly, help me out please!" The nub begged.

"Freddie doesn't want to be a girl Spencer!" She yelled. "And neither does Gibby."

"Yet you're asking me to make them into one." He shook his head. "I'm sorry to say this guys, but ya see, I'm an artist not a doctor. They're two, completely different things. I can't turn boys into girls."

"Spencer, I don't think you understand what it is were asking." Freddie sighed.

"Then please explain, because I'm tempted to put a restraining order on you."

"Caaaarly." Freddie whined.

"We have to make Freddie into a girl in order to keep Sam out of trouble." Carly clarified.

The artist rubbed his chin as he tried to understand what his sister and her friend were requesting. "Oh, so what your asking is for me to-"

"Sculpt out a face for Freddie." She finished. "You know, like a mask."

" ah ha! I get it now." Spencer grinned. "Why didn't you just say that?"

Freddie and Carly looked at each other with quizzical expressions on their faces. Spencer had a point. For a while they were just beating around the bush. "We don't know?" They both said in unison.

"Right, well one of you is gonna have to make clear how it is you're planning to keep Sam out of trouble, because turning Freddie into a girl isn't really making all that much sense to me." Spencer reasoned. He folded his arms behind his head

"We think the best way to keep Sam out of trouble is to send someone to act as her conscience." Carly answered. She swayed back and forth on her heels. "She can't do it alone Spencer. She needs someone to tell her the difference between right and wrong."

"I hacked into the Campsite's database and added me and Gibby to the listing file." Freddie added. "So it's not likely that we will get caught."

"Why don't you just go Carly?" Spencer narrowed his eyes.

"And ruin my permanent record. I think not!" She defended. "Also, the girls there are extremely hostile. I could loose an arm!" She freaked.

"Why does Gibby need to go?" Spencer continued with the questions. He was already feeling skeptical, and both Carly and Freddie knew it.

"There's no way I'd do something like this alone." Freddie scoffed. He stuffed his hands into his pockets.

"I don't know Kiddo." Spencer said, nudging Carly's side. "This doesn't sound like a smart idea to me. So many things could go wrong, and I- I'm gonna have to say no to this plan. Sam's a big girl now. She needs to learn how to start making better choices."

"She won't learn at that Camp Spencer. If anything she'll get worse."

"Sam adapts to her surroundings. She lives to survive not to change her morals." The dark haired boy commented.

"I'm sorry Carly and Freddie. My answer is no." Spencer replied as he refolded his hands on the table. He really didn't like upsetting his sister and her friends, but sometimes he needed to be a sensible adult.

"Oh Gees." Carly's head dropped towards the floor, making her look depressed and downcast. "So much for our brilliant plan." She walked dramatically over to Freddie and rested her head on his shoulder. "Shoot for plan b." She whispered out of the side of her mouth.

"What a Pity." Freddie immediately responded to Carly's command. He lifted his hands into the air. "But Carly, we must look on the bright side."

"The bright side?" Carly questioned and turned her gaze towards the ceiling.

Spencer felt as if he was beginning to watch some crack-based, soap opera.

"Yes, the bright side." Freddie continued. "With Sam gone, you can now express your _**individuality**_."

"My _**individuality**_."

"Yes, your _**individuality**_."

Spencer watched, memorized by Carly and Freddie's weird and strange performance.

"You can experiment with new things." He said shifting his hands around like a magician.

"Experiement?" Carly mimicked his hand movements

"Yah, experiment." Freddie grinned mischievously. Warning signals immediately went off in Spencer's head. He didn't like where this suspicious and open conversation was headed too.

"Like what Freddie? Please inform me of whatever it is your talking about, because I am confused and do no understand what you are implying." Carly said with wide eyes.

"Boys." Freddie bellowed and made a manly pose.

"Boys." Carly grinned and giggled girlishly.

"Yes, boys like me and well like me and pretty much me."

"You mean all boys." Carly gritted. "Not just you"

"Sure whatever." The nerd scoffed but continued. " You can experiment with boys as well as girls and animals and fruits and inanimate objects. You can try it all since Sam is gone. If you think about it, all Sam did while she was here was distract you from your _**individuality**_."

"My _**individuality**_."

"Yes, your _**individuality**_. And since we are at a very important age in our life, it is important to find out what kind of thing we enjoy spending most of our time with, and what we prefer to…."

"Ok stop, I've had enough of your _**individuality**_ spiel. My answer is no Carly, and that isn't going to change."

Carly stared at Spencer disbelievingly. "You know that iCarly means everything to me." She took a step towards her brother. Her hands were clenched, cheeks blotching red.

"I know but-"

"So you should know that without Sam our webcast can't go on." She interrupted him, her blood pressure rising. "If there was ever a time I really needed your help Spencer, now would be the time."

Spencer sighed heavily, and used his palms to rub the sides of his head. "Do you truly and honestly believe that Sam is not capable of behaving herself at this camp?" He asked, hating himself for what he was about to agree to.

Freddie shook his head.

"Just think about it Spencer." Carly replied

Spencer stared in to his sister's eyes. she was desperate. Freddie was desperate too, and it was apparent he was lacking his spunk since Sam always kept him on his toes. It was at this moment Spencer realized just how important it was for Sam to be around. Both carly and Freddie would lose themselves if she was gone for a year. "As much as my adult senses are going off and discerning this plan to be a really bad idea, I can see how important it is to you that Sam comes back home next week. I know your passion for iCarly, and without it you really can't express your _**individuality**_ as you and Freddie, here, so put it."

Freddie and the dark haired girl looked at each other excitedly.

"So does that mean you'll help?" Freddie asked.

"Yah, I guess."

"Thank you so much Spencer!" Carly squealed as she threw her arms around his neck. She kissed him multiple times on the cheek.

"But I have only one condition."

Carly pulled away and stared at him expectantly.

"Never _**ever**_ talk about your individuality like that _**ever**_ again." He warned. "I don't like the way you and Freddo refer to it. You make it seem so... perverted." He whispered the last word.

"That's kind of what we were going for." Freddie smirked.

"I don't care; just don't do it again."

"Fine, it's a deal." Carly smiled and pulled Spencer into a hug once again.

The elevator door opened, and Gibby casually walked into the apartment. He was half naked and completely sunburned. "Did I miss anything?" he asked while looking at Carly, Freddie, and Spencer in the kitchen. He peeled at some of the dead skin on his stomach.

"Nope, it definitely wouldn't faze me." Spencer said as he imagined the plumbed boy dressed up like a girl.

_**...**_

Review folks for faster updates.


	6. Reflecting One's Feminine Side

Whoa ho! I've been slow in the updates. I know this to be true, and I ask that you forgive me. I've been busy….. really busy, but I have not forgotten this fic. I will make it my duty to complete this story.

So I know everything seems to be going slow, which it is, but I do not like stories that rush into the plot. You should note that the plot is close( like next two chapters or less close). It's coming and it will be ha ha ha funny.

AN: In the show, There isn't much Gibby and Freddie interaction, at least not enough to be able to write a specific way for them to have conversations together. But I think I did a pretty good job in this chapter. As the story progresses, their conversations will get funnier and more…. iCarlyish. I want Gibby to be the one to help Freddie come to an understanding about his budding attraction towards Sam. Those scenes will be so much fun to write.

disclaimer: no owe

ignore the grammar mistakes they will be fixed.

_**iCross Dress**_

_Ch5. Reflecting One's Feminine Side_

* * *

"So what do you think?" Spencer smirked as he backed away from Gibby's face. He rubbed the palms of his hands over his jeans then narrowed his eyes in concentration. "There needs to be more shadowing under the eyebrows." He mumbled insightfully. "Well?" He turned his gaze towards his sister. For the past three and a half hours he had been sculpting masks for Gibby's and Freddie's faces. The masks, of course, were not top notch, but that was to be expected, considering he had only been given four hours to create them. The two nubs had to be present at the camp by eight o clock that night. If they were to arrive any later, the whole plan would fall through. So Spencer had made prototype masks, figuring he could make the real ones tomorrow.

"Wow spence, I- I don't know what to say." Carly stuttered as she stared at her two friends. They were sitting Indian style on top of the island in the kitchen.

"Weeellllll?" Spencer blinked, waiting for his sister's answer.

Carly still wasn't fully responding.

"They're horrible aren't they?" The artist frowned. "Ya gotta give me some cheese, Carly. You only gave me four hours to-"

"No…. they're amazing, I mean, I'm totally at a loss for words." Carly said and reached out to touch the end of Gibby's nose. "You actually made them look like girls." She started to grin. She looked at Freddie. "Freddie is almost…..he's almost attractive."

"Are you serious?" The nerd asked, completely shocked.

"Take a look for yourself?" Carly said as she handed him a mirror.

Freddie took it cautiously. When he saw his reflection his eyes widened. He really did look like a female. Spencer had intricately sculpted out a thin and petite nose. Light makeup gave the illusion that he had high cheek bones. The rubbery clay around his mouth made his lips appear full and pink. But what really amazed Freddie were the cute freckles speckled over the top of his nose. The nub touched the side of his face and whispered, "Goodness."

"Your like a six on a ten point hottie scale." Carly smirked.

Freddie beamed. "That's over fifty percent!" He cheered proudly, but then a thought dawned on him, and he became serious. "Wait, I shouldn't be happy about being a semi-attractive girl, should I?" He looked at Spencer.

The adult shrugged. "I'd be delighted."

"What about me, Carly?" Gibby asked.

Carly smiled uneasily. Gibby looked like a girl, but his gibbyness seeped through his artificial, female features. Sam wasn't a fool; so Carly hoped that her blonde friend wouldn't become suspicious, but this was still only a prototype. Spencer would definitely perfect the mask by tomorrow night. "I'd say you were a two or a one and a half, a zero maybe." She concluded with, "You're definitely a negative one."

Gibby stared at the girl, and for a moment he seemed genuinely hurt, but then he pumped his fist into the air and said, "Alright, at least I'm not a five."

"Right." Spencer sighed to himself. "So is this ok?"

"It's better then ok." Carly bounced on her heels. "It's perfect." She stopped "Well, it's perfect for Freddie."

"I knew you'd say that." The sculptor whined as he glared at Gibby.

_**…**_

"Ok, so why am I wearing a hippie costume!" Freddie complained. He, Carly, and Gibby were currently in the studio.

"It's not a hippie costume Freddie. It's just a broom skirt." Carly replied as she rolled up her sleeves. "Come here, I need to make a few minor adjustments." Freddie stepped forward and she kneeled down beside him.

Freddie looked down at the long flowing article of clothing. "Ughhhhhhh." he groaned. This was not what he had in mind.

"What's wrong with you?" Carly snapped.

"Nothing." The boy answered, fidgeting where he stood.

"If there was nothing wrong with you, you wouldn't have 'ughhhhhhhhed' like that."

"It's just that I expected to wear something less girly."

The girl cracked a grin. "Well, then you're a dummy." She said while tugging on the end of his skirt.

The nerd crossed his arms over his chest and pouted.

Carly ignored him. "I like this outfit on you. It makes you seem mysterious."

"Mysterious?" Freddie repeated and cocked an eyebrow. He stared down at Carly, watching her while she worked. "You're just saying that. How does a hippie, broom skirt make someone look mysterious?"

"The white and purple makes the skirt feel very modest, but the black penny-tee is edgy." She smiled up at the boy. "Trust me it's mysterious."

"Ow!" Freddie suddenly jumped. "Watch where you're pricking that pin."

"Sorry." Carly giggled sheepishly. "You know what else?"

"What?" Freddie asked. He was growing slightly annoyed.

"This outfit somehow draws out your tech geek attributes too." Carly slowly stood to her feet. She looked over her geeky friend until something clicked inside her head. "If you were a girl Freddie, you would dress like this." She decided. "This isn't just a disguise, it's a reflection of your feminine side."

The dork stared at his female friend as if she were a nutcase. "I think your having too much fun with this."

"You have no idea." She smirked.

A cold chill went down Freddie's spine, but he shrugged it off. "Is this all I'm going to be wearing?"

"I packed you two more skirts and three more tops as well as a pair of pants and some pajama's."

"Thanks mom." Freddie said sarcastically. He walked over to his cart of electronic gadgets.

"Oh, and I got you these." Carly smirked as she pulled a pair of fake boobs out from under her shirt.

Freddie's eyes widened. "I knew all along your boobs weren't that big."

"Oh shut up!" Carly replied and threw the jelly looking sacs at Freddie's face.

He caught them and flinched at the same time. It looked like he was juggling.

"I gave Gibby a bundle of random dresses." Carly said as she watched her friend freak out with the fake boobs in his hands. "He's trying them on right now."

"Why all dresses?" He said as he slowly slipped the sacs down his shirt. The moment should have been awkward, but it surprisingly wasn't.

"At the camp, he'll probably end up being the weird outcast that everyone ignores and or hates; so I didn't put much thought into his outfits."

"I guess that makes sense." The boy chuckled.

"Just make sure he doesn't walk around topless…..please."

Freddie's eyes widened. "Maybe I should have picked someone else to accompany me on this mission."

"Gibby will be fine. But now, let's work on your hair." Carly walked over to the other side of the studio and pulled out some wigs that were tucked neatly under the hood of the prop car.

"Are those sanitary?" The dork immediately asked.

Carly didn't answer. She made him try on three wigs. The first one was blonde and curly. The second one was red and wavy, and the third one was dark brown and straight. Freddie chose the brown one.

"I like the bangs." He shrugged as he looked at himself in the mirror. The bangs ran across his forehead like an Asian haircut. It was a pleasant wig. It was very long, reaching down to the end of Freddie's back.

Carly stared at him completely dumbfounded. "You should have been born a girl Freddie."

"I can't accept that as a compliment!" The nub freaked. He was extremely offended.

Gibby walked out from behind the stage at that same moment wearing a yellow sundress.

"What took you so long, Gibs?" Carly asked. Freddie was just as curious.

"This is the only dress that fits."

"Of course." Carly sighed.

"Boobs!" Gibby shouted and pointed a finger at Freddie. "Freddie has boobs!"

"They're not real. Calm down." Freddie laughed and slipped a sac out of his shirt. Gibby made a face then screamed when Freddie threw the sac towards him.

"Hey, those are expensive. Don't toss them around. They're not toys!" Carly complained "Here Gibby." She said while handing him the red wig. "Try this on and see how it looks. I'm going to find you some more dresses." She quickly stalked out of the studio.

"What do you think?" Gibby asked once he pulled the wig on top of his head.

"It strangely suits you." Freddie answered truthfully.

"Ya know, if someone, besides Spencer or Carly, were to find you and me in this room dressed up like this, they'd probably jump to very bad conclusions."

The technician twitched.

"But that outfit suits you," Gibby went on. "It makes you look mysterious." He said, making his voice sound mystical.

"That's what Carly said." Freddie scoffed. "You both don't know what you're talking about."

"Maybe not…so have you come up with a name yet?" Gibby asked as he played with the sequence on his dress.

"A name for what?" Freddie asked, and pushed himself up off of his cart.

"A name For yourself. You can't exactly call yourself Freddie, especially not while you're wearing a skirt and makeup." The chubby nub stated. He semi rolled his eyes.

"Oh, no I haven't." The dark haired boy rubbed his chin. "Hmmmmm, I've always liked the name Shasha."

"You look more like a flora to me." Gibby declared.

"Flora?"

"Yah. Flora."

"Why flora?"

"Because."

Freddie knew he wasn't going to get a better answer than that. "So I should call myself flora?"

"Yes."

Freddie opened his mouth to say one more thing, but in the end he didn't really care what he was called.

"What do I look like to you?" Gibby asked.

Freddie looked at him closely. He looked like a read headed bumble bee. Yellow was not Gibby's color. "Gabby." He smirked. "You look like a Gabby."

"Are you sure because I was thinking more on the lines of glinda."

"No, you're a Gabby."

"But that's really close to gibby."

"Yah it is."

"But my cousin's name is Gabby."

"You're point being…"

"I'll just ask carly."

"She'll say the same thing."

There was a weird, but not awkward, silence.

"So why are we doing this again?" Gibby patted down the top of his new hair piece as he walked over to one of the bean bags. I heard this was your idea." He dropped into the seat.

"It was." The boy replied and relaxed once more on his cart.

"So?" Gibby spread out his hands. He wanted an answer.

"Were trying to save iCarly Gibby. That's why we're doing this."

"But isn't this a little extreme."

Freddie blinked

"I mean, couldn't you just sneak over to the camp and install some cameras on Sam's clothes or something. You've got a lot of gizmos. You could give her an ear piece and a small mic to communicate with."

Freddie had nothing to say.

"I don't know," Gibby continued, "that just seems more practical to me then dressing up like a girl and sneaking over to a camp where we could possibly get the chiz knocked out of us by some she-hooligans."

"When did you become so perceptive?" Freddie asked, confused and annoyed. He had not expected Gibby to spout off what most folks would deem as 'common sense.'

"I'm not being perceptive. I'm just being realistic, I guess I just feel like you're going out of your way to help Sam, and I honestly want to know why."

"I don't know why Gibby, and even if I did know why, I highly doubt it would be an interesting reasoning."

"Do you like Sam?"

"I hate Sam," Freddie impulsively replied, "but I love Carly; so I'm doing this for her." He paused. "Ah ha! There's my answer." The boy grinned. "I'm going out of my way for Sam so that I can make Carly happy." He wanted the conversation to end.

Gibby stared at him for a moment, as if he were actually contemplating something. He shrugged and spoke saying: "I don't get humans. That's why I like marsupials. They're not confusing"

Carly walked back into the studio and immediately felt a weird tension. She looked between Gibby and Freddie and cocked both eyebrows. "Whoa, is there something going on in here that I need to know about?" She held up her hands. "Wait, let me rephrase that. Is there something going on in here that I _**don't**_ need to know about?"

Freddie squinted his eyes. "I'm going to pretend that you aren't implying something despicable, and Gibby is just asking me absurd questions about Sam."

"What kind of questions?" Carly asked, suddenly interested.

"I just asked him if he liked Sam. I don't see how that is an absurd question?" The plumped boy defended.

"It's absurd because the answer is obvious."

"No, it isn't obvious, otherwise I wouldn't have asked."

Carly pursed her lips, feeling a little confused. "This conversation seems pointless to me; so let's forget it ever happened, and Gibby follow me. I've got some special things for you to try on."

"Ooo this sounds exciting." The plumped boy perked up. Gibby followed the slim girl out the door, leaving Freddie by himself with his thoughts. It was plausible that he was going out of his way because he liked Sam, but it was only plausible. It was no way, in shape or form, possible. He and Sam were like water and oil, they couldn't mix, yet nothing could explain why he felt so worked up about Gibby suspecting he liked the crazy blonde. Freddie was confident in his love for Carly. He was obvious in his love fore Carly. So why did Gibby believe there was a possibility that he had feelings for Sam? But Freddie had to remember that Gibby was a little slow.

The nerd sighed and grabbed his tool box. He was thinking to much. He pulled out a screwdriver and began tweaking with some of his gear. If Freddie didn't think Gibby was such an idiot, the chubby boy may have opened the nerd's eyes to something he hadn't noticed before, and that was his obvious attraction to the notorious Sam Puckett.

* * *

...p...o...o...d...l...e...s...&...n...o...o...d...l...e...s...


	7. Second Thoughts On the Plan

**Heh heh heh. Man, it took me a long time to update, but I literally had no time to sit down and write this chapter. But it's here now, and it's the last filler . Sam will be back in the next chapter, and the plot of the story will begin, and it will be delightful. I will be introducing a few new characters into the story as well as a potential love interest for Spencer. The show always has Spencer with some random chick; so why not hook him up with a random girl in this story. **

**One thing I quickly want to mention is the fact that I made up the name of a Community college. I have no idea whether or not Seattle has a community college, but in this story one exists now. Ha ha ha. So if anyone decides to be really technical about this story here's me claiming that I made up a school right now. **

**Anyway, please enjoy this chapter. Don't mind the grammar slip ups. I will fix them.**

**And one more thing….Review!**

**Disclaimer: no own**

_**iCross Dress**_

_Ch6. Second Thoughts On the Plan  
_

* * *

What the heck was Freddie getting himself into. He grabbed his stomach, trying to calm the locusts that were throwing a sock hop in his gut. Yah, that's right, _**locusts**_. To say he had butterflies would be an understatement. He was petrified. The nerd bowed his head and shivered.

"Freddie, are you gonna be ok?" Carly asked and rested her hand on his knee. The nub stared at her fingers and swallowed. Carly was being intimate with him? This was definitely a bad omen.

The girl felt Freddie tense and slowly removed her hand from his leg. "Isn't it great that Gibby's mom let us borrow her car?" She said awkwardly.

Freddie nodded then turned his head to look out the window. He was blushing.

"I have the coolest mom ever!" Gibby announced from the front seat. "I look just like her." He glanced at his two friends from the rearview mirror and grinned.

"Yah, ya do look like her." Spencer agreed and then shuddered. "But it's a not a good thing." He added.

"I think Freddie is getting cold feet, Spence. What should I do?" Carly asked while staring at her friend. She was worried.

"I'm not getting cold feet. I'm just questioning my mental health." The nub stated. "Can't a guy figure out whether or not he's crazy without getting criticized? That would be great." The boy huffed then turned his head back towards the window.

"He's right kiddo?" Spencer sighed. "Sometimes a guy just needs to think about his brain and ponder the different types of chemical imbalances it might hold. It's all a part of growing up and becoming a man. Puberty….puberty. It's a weird time of life." The adult gripped the steering wheel and shrugged.

"That's a load of bull!" Gibby suddenly yelled. "I've never heard of anyone pondering about the chemical imbalances in their brain."

"Well, that explains why you're clueless to the ones that you have." The artist mumbled.

"What?" Gibby snapped.

"Ok, everyone just calm down!" Carly hollered.

"The only one who needs to calm down is you, Miss let's scream so that everyone will obey my commands." The chubby boy narrowed his eyes, causing a crease to form on his artificial forehead.

"Spencer, just turn on the radio." The girl sighed.

"I have a better idea. Let's go back home and make up a completely different plan!" Freddie freaked.

"See, cold feet." Carly complained.

"Man Up, Fredmeister. We are less then fifteen minutes away from the camp. You can't back out now. Besides that, it took me four hours to create those masks. And they are not going to waste." The artist muttered the last sentence.

"I wasn't thinking straight. I- I was… I was desperate, ok." The nerd tried to speak coherently, but he was growing frustrated. "I'm in my right head now, and I know this plan is not going to work."

No one said a word.

Did they not get it? Freddie bit his lip. If he and Gibby got caught, his life would be over. The consequences would be dire. We're talking public humiliation, possible house arrest, an enraged, psychopathic mother, and worst of all… limited educational opportunities. Freddie would never forgive himself if his only option after high school was SCC (Seattle Community College).

"Desperate for what, Fred?" Spencer finally asked. Concern was in his tone.

The nerd clenched his fists. They didn't get it at all.

"He was desperate to save Sam." Gibby answered.

Freddie fought the urge to punch the back of Gibby's head. "No, That's not right. I was not desperate to save Sam. I was desperate to save the webcast." He spoke smoothly. "And as common sense tells us, it's not smart to make plans when you're desperate."

"If it makes you feel any better, Freddie," Carly started, "I'm scared too." She replaced her hand on his knee. "But somehow, I just know that everything is going to be alright, because I trust you." She looked into his eyes and smiled. Freddie's heart tightened. He would not allow her to trick him. He had to end this mission tonight, because all signs pointed to failure. The girl's hand slipped slightly up his thigh. But Carly _was_ really pretty. Yah, she was manipulating him, but it was impossible to resist her rare, soft and enticing touch.

"Maybe I'm overreacting."

"Uh huh." The thin brunette nodded.

Gibby turned and looked at the two teenagers in the back seat. He made an annoyed face.

Freddie noticed it, and frowned. "What was that look for Gibby?"

"What look are you talking about?"

"This one." Freddie replied and contorted his mouth into a weird grimace.

"Well….. honestly Freddie, I don't think you should worry about whether or not we are going to get caught." Gibby paused. "Because we won't." He made a tsking noise with his tongue. "The only thing you need to worry about is your psyche. I assure you that by this time next week you're going to be extremely confused."

The nerd stared at the plumped boy baffled and anxious. Did Gibby really have a point to what he was saying? Who was Freddie kidding? Gibby was a retard. "What, are you psychic now or something?" He asked incredulously.

"Maybe." Gibby shrugged.

Carly Cocked an eyebrow. "What do you know that we don't?"

Gibby sighed then turned and faced forward.

"I don't get you." Spencer looked at the boy in the passenger seat. "But if you really are a psychic, can you tell me what I will be having for dinner two days from now?"

"Ravioli."

"Ah ha. You're not a psychic, because two days from now I have a date at the groovy smoothie, and they do not serve ravioli."

"Ok Spencer." The chubby boy smugly replied. "You'll see. You all will see."

The mood in the care became awkward, but Spencer quickly broke the tension by turning on the radio. "I hope they play my Jam." He said hopefully.

"And what, exactly, is your Jam?" Freddie asked, trying to feel amused.

"You don't want to know." Carly replied.

_**…**_

When they finally reached the camp grounds, night had fallen. Freddie looked out the window and noticed there to be a sky full of stars. He blinked. The city couldn't reveal this kind of beauty.

"Get out of the car." Carly whispered, once Spencer finally parked. They were currently on the side of a deserted highway and about a block away from the actual camp grounds. "Get your bags." The girl said as she pushed the car trunk open. Freddie pulled out a large black bag that was long and shaped like a Lincoln log. It had straps; so he buckled the bag against his body. Carly was subtly reminded of her dad. Freddie's bag was similar to what a soldier would carry.

Gibby pulled out a small book bag. "I only have one outfit." He said. No one replied because it was typical.

"Ok, so here's the deal," Freddie grabbed two flashlights from the trunk, "the last bus arrived about a half an hour ago, so that gives us about fifteen minutes before the last orientation starts. I don't know how heavy the security is beyond the front gates, but we can assume that it's nothing me and the gibster here can't handle." Freddie patted Gibby on the back.

"Ya know, It's kind of hard to take you seriously, especially since you're wearing a skirt."

"Shut up Spencer." Freddie sneered. This caused his long, fake hair to whip the side of his face. It left strands in his mouth. "Gah." He spat. "I'm not going to get used to this." He complained. He quickly snatched a black, ball cap from his bag and pushed it on top of his head. "Alright, let's do this now because I still might change my mind."

_**…**_

The walk to the camp ground was fairly quiet. It was obvious everyone was nervous. Freddie felt as if he were going to have a heart attack. Spencer didn't feel good either. He was suppose to be the sensible adult, but somehow he had lost all sense. They reached the front lawn of the camp and stopped a few hundred yards away from the gate. It was being guarded by an officer.

"We're going to have to sneak in from either the back or the side." Spencer rubbed the bottom of his chin.

"I think the side would be best." Gibby chided in.

"How do you know?" Carly challenged the both of them. "You can't really see the camp. It's too dark. For all we know their could be guards on the sides too."

"Well, if there's guards on the sides they'll probably be in the back as well." Spencer responded.

"So what do you suggest that we do?" Gibby crossed his arms over his chest.

Everyone turned to look at Freddie.

"We'll sneak in through the side." The technician quickly answered.

"Why?" Carly immediately asked.

"Well If you look," Freddie pointed, "you'll see that there are two huge posts directly behind the front gate. Each Post is holding three large security lights that rotate a full 360 degrees… That's a circle Gibby…If there are two posts in the front then there are probably two more posts in the back. They'll only go of if an alarm is sounded, but the lights will definitely cover most of the camp ground. If there were to be any lapses of darkness at all, they'd only be appear on the east and west side of the camp."

"You are a smart boy." Spencer grinned and ruffled the top of Freddie's head.

"Please don't do that." The nerd said while swatting the artist's hand away. "We have to go now because orientation starts in less then five minutes." Freddie began moving. "When we reach the gymnasium, I'll uses this orange reflector to signal you and Spencer." He showed them the device. "I'll reflect it three times when we're clear."

"What if we don't see it." Carly started chewing on her fingernails.

"Then me and Gibby have most likely been caught, and thrown into solitary confinement. It will be your duty to come bust us out before they contact my mother. I don't want to attend community college!"

Carly nodded her head. "Right. me and Spencer will definitely save you."

"Good." Freddie said sternly. He grabbed Gibby by the arm. "But don't worry, that's only a worse case scenario."

"Wait," the girl frantically stepped in front of the two boys. "Take this." She said and pulled out a contact case. "You're going to need these."

"Am I really?" Freddie asked skeptically. "Sam doesn't pay attention to the details. She isn't going to recognize me just by my eyes. "

"You never know."

" If you say so." He said while taking the case. "Alright then," He glanced around nervously, "here goes nothing." He said then took off in a dead sprint.

"That's one hunk if a sixteen year old girl." Spencer said proudly as he watched Freddie and Gibby disappear into the darkness.

Carly opened her mouth to say something, but she knew it'd be pointless.

_**…**_

Freddie could not see in the dark. He quickly flipped out a small flash light. "Whoah." His voice cracked and he skidded to a stop. He and Gibby were about to run into a large gate. "Stop Gibs." He whispered and held out his arm. The chubby nub ran into it.

"What's going on. I can't see a thing."

The technician directed Gibby forward and made him reach out his hand.

"It's a gate." Gibby stated.

"I should have known the gate wrapped around the whole area. Hang on a second." Freddie turned and opened a small side compartment on his bag.

"What are you doing?"

Freddie didn't answer. He just showed Gibby a pair of wire cutters. "There's probably bobbed wire on the top." He said as he hiked up his skirt. Gibby mimicked his actions and they both started up the tall gate. They quickly reached the top, and Freddie's assumptions were correct. There was bobbed wire. It took him a good minute to cut a wide enough space for he and Gibby to climb over, but it had not been a difficult task to complete. Once he and Gibby dropped over to the other side, a small, tension-filled sigh escaped between his lips. But Freddie didn't feel completely relieved. He wouldn't feel safe until he was inside the gymnasium.

"The orientation has probably already started." He said as he smoothed out his outfit. They needed to get there fast. They ran through the camp grounds, passing some training fields, as well as a cafeteria.

The gymnasium was a large, squared building that had a small dome on the top. Light could be seen shining through the dome and through the windows. Gibby was the first one to spot it. "There's the gym." He panted.

The boys tiptoed forward. Two officers were smoking cigarettes.

"Get down!" Freddie pulled Gibby to the ground.

"What do we do now?" He whispered.

The technician shushed him. "Do you have something I can throw?" He asked.

"Um no."

"This is bad." The nerd scratched the back of his neck. "We really need to get inside before they call our names."

"Let's just walk up to the officers and say we need to get inside."

"No, that's way too suspicious. And just downright stupid." Suddenly Freddie could here the muffled sound of his fake name being called.. "Did you here that?" He panicked.

"They're calling for Flora!" Gibby's eyes widened, and he grabbed Freddie's orange reflector off of his bag,

"What are you doing? We need that." Freddie snapped.

"No, what we need is to get inside of the gymnasium." With that, Gibby turned the reflector on and threw it. The two officers immediately noticed it.

"They're going after it." Freddie watched with a surprised expression.

"Let's Go!" Gibby said hurriedly and sprang to his feet. He pulled Freddie up, and they both ran for the front door.

_**…**_

"Spencer it's been ten minutes. I haven't seen an orange reflector yet have you?"

The adult man gulped. "Nope, no I haven't."

"Is this the worst case scenario?" The girl, who had been sitting Indian style on the ground, stood shakily to her feet.

"I would suppose so."

You know what's gonna happen next, right?" Carly slurred as she took deep breaths.

Spencer stood behind her. "I got you little sis."

And with that Carly fainted.


End file.
